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Guess what? I'm almost done making up my Incomplete classes for last term (couldn't finish them because I was in the hospital)! For this week all that's left is to take my History final. Suprisingly, I'm not too stressed out about it. Actually, I haven't been anxious about much of anything since I was released from the hospital. Don't get me wrong, I still freak out about some stuff like a test that I took today that I didn't study for much. But when I actually went to do it, I found out that I knew some things (thankfully, it was multiple choice). When I do get hyper anxiety about stuff, I just stare at a blank piece of paper and draw whatever I "see" on it. I'm telling you, it's really refreshing afterwards. Especially if I use watercolor or colored pencils. I haven't been using the latter lately because I can't find my pencil sharpener. I know I shoved it in my bookbag someplace.

Oh and Belladoragirl, I think the layout on SiriusNews looks very nice and professional. And when are you going to update B. Yawn Death?! No offense, but I'm looking foward to reading some new fics (Harry Potter or otherwise. As long as it's not m-preg or a Snarry I can handle it)

Happy Happy Happy

Well, it's my boyfriend's birthday so I made him a chocolate cake (it's gooood). We've done nothing but cuddle and (me) study for my evil evil Psych exam on Tuesday (the professor said that the average grade is a C+). We were originally going to watch a movie but ended up seeing Liar, Liar instead. We ate at Bob's Yac Shack for dinner (unfortunately we didn't get to try their yac sauce) and saw a friend on the way back.

You Are a Mermaid

You are a total daydreamer, and people tend to think you're flakier than you actually are.
While your head is often in the clouds, you'll always come back to earth to help someone in need.
Beyond being a caring person, you are also very intelligent and rational.
You understand the connections of the universe better than almost anyone else.

First Date

Wow. This weekend has been absolutely amazing as well as a little surreal. My SSB was dropped off around 4 and (poor baby) had to wait outside for 2 hours for my parents and I to eat lunch, go to the grocery store, and get settled in (my dad took FOREVER to get updates installed on the computer. See, he doesn't know that I have a boyfriend because our relationship (D et I) is still emotionally shaky). I was so nervous and excited to see him (in the beginning there were some VERY awkward pauses and shyness on my part. But eventually we sat down on the couch and cuddled and talked and then we made dinner (this very tasy Fruit and Nut Salad. Has Mandarin oranges, grapes, toasted almounds, and a sweet lemony dressing). We slipped in the movie Just Friends which I liked a lot (suprisingly because I think most romantic comedies aren't funny). After that was over, we talked for a bit more and ate strawberries (too lazy to do what we had originally planned and dip them in chocolate). I went to bed around 1 and he did the same (nothing and i repeat nothing happened). Got up around 8:30 and had some leftover donuts from yesterday (Saturday). Were originally going to watch another movie but sat on the couch and cuddled and talked some more. Did watch some TV though and played a very interesting game of Scrabble. His roomate wasn't able to make it to pick him up so he had to stay another night. I know all of this is very quick and rushed and there's a lot of details that I didn't mention but I really really miss him now. Did I mention he gave me my first kiss? :)
Ugh. Have absolutely no motivation to do work (2 term papers, a required reading,etc). The first one is about Sylvia Plath which is going to be fairly self explanatory (basically I plan on writing about her relationship with her family based on some of her poems). Actually I have more motivation to do this one than I do the second one because I hate the book (Camus's The Stranger. Very cheerful stuff. The main message is how our daily existance is meaningless).

Hearts and Kisses

I know it's a day late but . . . Happy Valentines Day! Yesterday I tried to look for some e-cards to my (giggles-I still can't believe I'm saying this) boyfriend but since we've only gone out 2 weeks I couldn't find the right one. They all were either too cutesy too romantic or too sexual. But there were plenty of funny Anti-Valentines day cards so I sent one of them to Belladoragirl. Hope you liked it.


Goddamit. I had the most perfect schedule worked out for Spring term and what happens? I can't take one and another gets cancelled and I'm gonna have to take an 8am. Grrr.

I've decided that I'm going to tell him either this weekend or the next. One of my roomates brought up the point that if I wait until Spring break then he might ruin it or wait till the end and be filled with anxiety the entire time.


Well, I finally met with my advisor about my major change. He didn't flip out at all but was still insistant about minoring instead of majoring in English. As much as I would like to do this I can't due to having a limited amount of electives. I'm still grieving over the loss of my History minor. Oh, how I would have looked foward to taking a course on Ancient Rome, Ancient and Medieval Women, or Russia.

Zanadoo Zelda

Well, suprisingly (and thankfully), I don't have much going on this weekend. I've taken care of my readings for American Classics and 20th Century Fiction. I have to say, I'm actually (dare I say it?) enjoying what we're reading in my modern fiction class. It's Brave New World and it's about a futuristic society where human beings are cloned and conditioned for their environment. I've always like dystopian novels because they make you think. Now I wish that I could say the same thing for what we're supposed to read in American Classics. "The Open Boat" by Stephen Crane and some of Robert Frost's poems. We're slowly moving out of the realist period (where nature doesn't give a damn about you and man is not divine) and into the fun fun Modernist period where everybody was just so glad to be alive. How nice it must have been to harp and haw over how Western Civilization is declining and there's nothing you can do about it. Why does it have to be so negative? I mean to a certain point I kind of agree with them, but does it really have to be that way? Could it just be that we're so aware of ourselves and our actions (moreso than at the height of Western Civilization, the Renaissance) that we overthink things too much and assume the worst? I don't know. I don't claim to have an answer. It's just questions that have been bothering me ever since we started talking about Modern literature. Even though this period of literature isn't my favorite, I still am curious about T.S. Eliot's poems. Along with Joyce, T.S. Eliot is considered THE author of Modernism (his name, coincidently, is an anagram for toilets).

Yeah yeay yea

I'm still waiting for my stupid advisor to e-mail me back. I have to get my new major aproved in time for Spring Term scheduling which is in TWO WEEKS!


I had a meeting at noon today with the director of the Art Therapy department. For some reason, I was expecting a crusty old lady and got a middle-aged woman with red frizzy hair. I started off by saying why I wanted to switch from English to Art Therapy: 1. Although I love books and libraries, I can't imagine working in one day after day 2.I notice that the papers which I enjoy writing the most involve analysing what goes on in a character's head and why they do what they do 3. Even though I haven't drawn much in the past year, I still have an interest in art (as well as taken a lot of art classes in high school. She said that's exactly what we look for in a career in Art Therapy and proceeded to tell what I would be taking. All of my art classes are mostly first year stuff because we're primarily concerned with the process of making art and not the finished product. I also have to take some psychology classes including Social psychology and Child psychology. We mapped my college years and it turns out that I won't have to spend another semester/year (Yay!). I've taken most of my Common core (science, math, college writing, etc) and my English major courses go into the 7 elective spots. The only bad thing about all this is I may have to give up my History minor and this really bums me out (I really really really wanted to take a class on Ancient Rome and Imperial Russia). But other than that I'm satisfied with it. Now all that's left is to find more info on this. Need to talk to someone. Need to do more research. And tell my advisor that I'm switching (I hope he doesn't put up much of a fuss). And tell my father (I'll save that for AFTER I switch).



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July 2007


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